Melt my heart.

Melt My Heart

Well, if you insist….


Layout

Step 1. Lay out your hearts on a piece of parchment paper on a cookie sheet. You can do it freeform or with a pattern. I used a food coloring pen to make a light outline on the parchment paper; you can also use a (big) cookie cutter as a guide or form.

Mist
Step 2. Mist with water. That’s a light spray, not super-soaker, got it? (This step is important– don’t skip it.)

Second layer
Step 3. Add the second layer. Match the same outline, and try to make most of the hearts rest on at least two below. (That will help the pile stick together.) Careful not to slide the pieces around too much.

Wet and ready
Step 4. After arranging the second layer, mist with water again. Preheat the oven to 300 F.

Baked
Step 5. Bake 40 minutes at 300 F. Important: When the time is up, turn the oven off without opening the door, and let it cool slowly in the oven over the next couple of hours. (Your heart will break if it cools too quickly.)

Horta Aorta
Final Step. Once cool, you can remove it from the oven and cookie sheet. Handle gently.

Love You... do good.
“Love You… Do Good.”

How Nice
“How Nice”

Cloud Nine
“Cloud Nine”

Up side down
And here’s how the bottom looks. Note the incomplete fusion on the upper left side.

Heart of Hearts
Before you ask how it tastes, please note that we don’t exactly recommend that you go around eating things like this in place of actual food.

The flavor of (raw) conversation hearts is best described as somewhere between that of various competing chewable tablets for upset stomachs. After baking the texture changed substantially, to something approximating that of the ultra-hard freeze-dried micro-miniature marshmallows that lurk in certain packets of instant hot cocoa. The faux fruit flavors are now muted with subtle toasty overtones.

(Now for the record: let no one say that we don’t make sacrifices in the name of research.)

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7 thoughts on “Melt my heart.

  1. Shoulda done something with candyfab! Fused some hearts together into more custom shapes.
    -aRkAoss

  2. My dog stole the melted heart from where it had been put "safe, out of his reach," and ate it.

    And then made a terrific mess trying to get at all the little half-melted hearts that the thing had shed in the process of it being stolen and eaten.

    And then went back AGAIN to make sure he got it all.

    So there’s at least one critter out there who thinks it’s absolutely divine food. (Not that I recommend actually feeding these things to dogs.)

  3. I did too
    if people made candy hearts that said that, how long do you think it would take before they are sued?

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